Drunken Canadians: here to remind you hockey season has started.

What has become a yearly occurrence at the pub is underway once again. It all started a little over 10 years ago when a group of Canadians who live in Kennebunkport discovered that Ol’ McBarney had cable. These bastards, desperate for something called “Hockey Night in Canada” ascended to the pub to take advantage of a channel previously unknown to me- the CBC (Canadian Broadcasting Corp). What they were so desperate for was a sport I could have cared less about… ice hockey. Ice Hockey can best be described as barbaric… a bunch of men with sticks run at each other, beat the hell out of each other, sometimes to the point where they bleed, and try to put a little piece of fucking plastic into a goal. All the men that play this game are hairy and toothless; some of them were described by the Canadians as “Newfies”, apparently some sort of slang for a country bumpkin.

In any case, as you might have guessed, I am in love with this sport- it is a man’s game in a sporting world that is now dominated by pussy pre-Madonnas like fucking Terrell fucking Owens. These men don’t whine and complain they fight and bleed.

The only bad part about Hockey? Don Cherry. This guy, who is the host of Hockey Night in Canada, is a fucking nut job. First of all, the man dresses like you might imagine Rod Roddy would if he were going to a formal event. Perhaps he is wearing this horrid clothing to take attention away from his fake-tanned-wrinkly-assed face. And for some stupid reason this guy is always giving a thumbs up, I’ll tell you where I’d like to stick that thumb.

Otherwise the sport is exciting and fast paced, and it is made even more fun by the Canadians who watch it, these guys know how to drink! While they generally are insulting my beer, (they are always clamoring for something called Blue) they will drink what ever they are given, and they will have a good time drinking it.

Yes the drunken Canadians are back and that means hockey season is on, and I have a feeling this season will be (in the words of the announcer of my favorite team) top shelf (where momma hides the cookies).